You Are NOT Lost just because You Are STILL Searching

 

 

You Are NOT Lost just because You Are STILL Searching

 

 

 

I want to step into you. To feel you. To feel the deepest parts of your soul that scare you and that you run away from.

 

For those voices live inside of me too, and I want to help you listen to them.

 

Beautiful soul – you are not broken. You are not needing to be fixed. And you are not DONE.

 

I know this feeling – this desperation, this fear, this all consuming worry that you are not and never will be – ENOUGH.

 

You feel like your whole life you have been climbing, scrambling mostly, trying to make it look as elegant as possible, but only you really see the scratches, bruises and scars that you have gotten along the way.

 

And you wonder, sometimes in the darkest moments when you are totally alone and the world has faded away and nothing and no one requires OF YOU in that moment –

 

Am I lost? I feel that I am on the right path, it feels MINE, it feels RIGHT.

 

But then why am I still searching? Why am I not THERE – if this path truly is MINE?

 

Have I somehow veered off without realising and now am miles and years from where I truly want to go?

 

You are not lost, just because you are still searching.

 

I know those voices well – that second guess you, that try to point you to the “proof” that this isn’t working, that you’re not really getting anywhere, and why don’t you just stop, give up and give in –

 

And fall into line with the lemmings.

 

And in those painful moments when you are tested once more, when the walls come caving in and you have to once again BREATHE and RELEASE and TRUST in yourself –

 

You remember once again – why you can’t do that. You can dress yourself up all you like, walk and talk and pretend to be like them – but you never will be.

 

You aren’t a lemming, never have been, and never will be.

 

And though you feel lost, feel like you are forever chasing an elusive dream that feels so close and yet so far at the same time –

 

You know there is no other way.

 

Beautiful soul, don’t turn away now. Your path is so much more complex because your destiny is so much greater than just you.

 

I know you have tried – to push this down, file it away, pretend it isn’t there.

 

Like someone who has allowed themselves to gain ever more weight will try to smooth their clothing, wear more layers, hide from the reality of the lumps and bumps they don’t want to admit to.

 

But just like those bumps will find a way out, your truth will ALWAYS push it’s way to the surface.

 

Over and over it will scream LISTEN.

LET ME OUT!

 

I don’t care that you’re scared, I don’t care that you don’t know HOW, I don’t care that you want to THROW IN THE TOWEL AND WALK THE FUCK AWAY!

 

I don’t care, I don’t care, I DON’T CARE!

 

Because I want what I want, what I need, what I am BORN for.

 

Regardless what your mere mortal being constraints think of that, let alone what any other mortal being LEMMINGS think of it.

 

This is beyond that, beyond them. Beyond even YOU in this time and space.

 

And it won’t shut up, won’t be silenced, won’t be pushed down and REFUSES to be forgotten.

 

You are searching because you are growing, ever expanding.

 

You are not dead, therefore you have life yet to search for. Goals, dreams, YOUR SOUL PURPOSE to follow and to be LED BY IT.

 

A lemming afterall perhaps – if only that you cannot help but continue to follow YOUR TRUE PATH.

 

No matter how long, how complex or how lost you feel along the way.

 

Keep going beautiful soul, for your own sake and for everyone else’s.

 

Let those voices say their bit, and bless them and keep going.

 

Feel the fear – and do what you need to do anyway.

 

You will ALWAYS feel this resistance, this frustration, this FUCK FUCK FUCK meltdowns…

 

You can choose to continue on despite of it.

 

You can choose to not let fear guide you, but rather your faith.

 

And in the end… really?!

 

You know you can’t not.

 

 

 

 

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